layers of an onion

as each layer peels back

another lesson is revealed

feels like a heart attack
when you ignore my appeal
trying so hard to not
say the last word
if only you knew where i was at
when only a text message was heard
now you ignore my goodnight
and i might as well not exist
don’t understand your plight
belittling me makes it all persist
there used to be a brightness
that broke when i was blamed
it dulled when i was ditched
and turned off when i felt ashamed
now i know that i don’t make progress
when i think of what i do not want
how is it that it feels i regress
unless i release all those things that haunt
who knew there was still pain there
i thought i really didn’t let myself care
then suddenly i am transported back beware
the feelings weren’t exactly encouraging in that layer
so step up the attitude
pull the old pages out
add new pages of gratitude
get a mantra to shout
let the old stuff be dead now
and remember the good
it has all found its way somehow
in the way that it should
sometimes i just wish that ol onion
didn’t bring about so many tears
makes a pain inside my head
that blocks off my longing ears
natural antiseptic
calm down what felt so hectic
i can finally sleep instead of being fetal on the floor
tonight i will dream of an adventure once more
i believe.



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